Rindu..sila pergi jauh-jauh

Hujung-hujung tahun biasanya mengamit rindu pada sesuatu. Apetah lagi pagi ini dapat emel dari kenalan satu group tesis. He sent a paper of our research. Hati saya bagai diseru-seru. Malam tadi saya membelek salinan tesis untuk diemel kan kepada cik junior saya ~bride-to-be..ehem~ she’s helping to write a research paper about my project. ~ye projek cik cacing~

curik dr fb cik sue ;p yer saya tidak malu bergambar dengan ekspresi muka yang buruk! lol

Seketika tadi saya mula mengaktifkan facebook. Dan terlihat la gambar yang diupload oleh group institusi research kami dulu. Gambar tentang seminar~yet student progress presentation~ rindu! Yer..masa dulu saya selalu mengeluh sebab saya la orang yang selalu paksa rela kena present projek saya -_-“ dahla dulu project leader meWAJIBkan student projek naungannya bentangkan kemajuan tiap-tiap dua minggu sekali. In english btw >.< bagi peminat tegar belacan harusla English saya berterabur sana sini berbanding student lain yang makanan hariannya spegetti dan keju ~sungguh hiperbola~

present kolokium siswazah -again curik dr fb org..kali ni en apai

makan-makan kat pantri student..heaven! 

Rindu nak mengantuk-mengantuk dalam seminar lepas tu bertebaran menjamu diri dengan jamuan kecil. Harus la ada neskepi dan kuih muih barang seketul dua..hihi. biasa kalau datang lab harus pagi dalam pukul 8.30. pastu breakfast dengan team kapak sumbing. Biasa tapau and makan sesama dalam pantry. Owh..sangat rindu bihun singapore unikeb + daging black pepper.

Lunch pulak paling rindu dengan laksa unikeb (lagik?), siput sedut dan ikan bakar..ke? drooling sangat-sangat..huhu. dalam kul 3.30 ke 4.00 ptg harusla menum petang. Nescafe o cecah beskut hup seng ke? Sambil bergosip-gosip, tukar-tukar cerita, sesi luahan perasaan dan lain-lain. Kul 5.00 leh balik da. Hoorey.. dan best nya negeri selangor banyak cuti! Hoorey lagi..harus la balik kampung dengan senang hati walaupun highway ke Seremban selalu jem.. ;p

Rindu nak stress-kan diri dengan siapkan slide untuk meeting, berebut-rebut hantar emel ke SV (dengan harapan first come first serve ke?), rindu nak berdebar-debar bertentang mata dengan project leader, rindu pada UKM, rindu pada semua nya..

rindu zaman kegemukan ke? hahahaha

tadaaa..team meeting masa kat langkawi kalau tak silap..sila buntangkan biji mata kalau tak nampak..huhu

meroyan sikit: -_-“ sepatutnya saya balik kg minggu ni…tapi rumah punya pasal terpaksa tangguh percutian -_-“

sedey sangat tau!!!!!!!

p/s favicon ade gambar mashi maro atas toilet bowl sambil kat kepala ade pengepam toilet..motip?? ;p

Cereka-ceriki...haissshhh

Sekarang ni I da jarang-jarang nak update status bagai kat fb. Dan kadang-kadang je I komen kat status kawan-kawan. Login fb selalu la. Just nak tengok update and gambar-gambar kawan-kawan. Macam trend lak orang-orang zaman millennium ni.. semua gambar pun nak masukkan dalam fb. ~well..tak kisah la..fb ko kan *tangan ke dada mata ke ats * lol~

So kawan-kawan seusia I ni ~lewat 20an..pfff~ ramai la yang dok khabarkan kat fb da pregnant la, da masuk hospital nak bersalin la, letak gambar newborn baby la..paling tak menahan nama budak-budak sekarang. Huhu..harusla berbelit nak menyebut plus panjang berjela…~whatever la..anak ko kan..~

Ahad lepas I g la kenduri kahwin colleague. Mujur gi belah lelaki nyer pihak (kawan I perempuan). Kalau pergi ari sabtu tu harusla I kene cuci periuk semua sebab after pengantin berarak makanan segala pon da diangkut oleh sanak sedara ;p.. tengah makan-makan encik tanya berapa kos cik pengantin buat majelis kat hotel 3 bintang. I cakap tak tau. Pastu encik kata die nak wat kat dewan kalo leh. Mak aih –I telan nasi pun cam tercekik- matila I kene pura-pura jadi wanita melayu terakhir kalo kene bersanding bagai. -_-“

Pastu I cakap kat encik.. xpayah la, I kalau leh nak wat yang wajib jer. Tunang-bersanding ni semua tak penting. Kalo encik nak wat kat dewan tah apetah lagi..encik bersanding sorang la. –sampai ke tua la I xkawen gamaknyer kalo harus bersanding-silat-berpelamin bagai-

Tapiiiiiii…………………………

Semua pun bila I da konvo master..my life will be incomplete if I didn’t put an end to what I have started years ago. Sebab I ada cita-cita nak ada phd before 40 ^_^ terpaksa la cari balik update journal. Manuskrip pon banyak kena gubal plus kene wat proposal la in case nak sambung phd. Bila fikir masa depan terus tersenyum sorang-sorang. Hihi.

Nota di pintu: letak nama anak Kasihku Tak Beropol dengan Jejaka Idaman Gadis Semalaya..boleh? hahahaah

bukan cikgu bahasa inggeris

i akan tag sesuatu subjek masa I sekolah dedolu.. contoh kalo I dapat cekgu yang garang I akan belajar subjek tersebut bersungguh2 supaya I xkene pape hukuman =p..contoh lagi..kalo I da terkena hukuman e.g cubet ke hape..i akan terus tag subjek 2 dengan cekgu2 nyer sekali sebagai xbest dan sewaktu dengannyer (ampun cekgu2 cikna chubby..huhu)

dan salah satu peristiwa sepanjang I belajar..i paling xleh lupa masa I darjah 3. I ketua darjah tau masa ni (huhu..) pas2 sebagai ketua darjah yang garang (khelass ko cikna..garang da jadi trademark ;p ) dan berdedikasi.. harusla I kene siapkan pape pun tugasan dengan kadar segera. Dan muka ni lah yang selalu anta buku kat meja cekgu. Tiba satu hari (masa ni kelas English) I anta la buku I pas abes salin sume yang cekgu tulis kat papan itam (owh ms ni masih guna papan itam yang berhabuk sana sini time nak padam…plus time nak buang habuk kat pemadam papan itam tu..hambek ko..xcukup dedua tangan jadi kaler putih..siap2 muka ko pon same cam wayang opera ) lol… ape I nak tulis td? Hahaha..ho k..pas2 I Tanya la cekgu tu sesuatu sambil tunjuk ke perkataan yang I Tanya tu..terus cekgu tu marah2 tanya I  balik perkataan tu nak sebut cmne?

Huh..nan hadoo la kan I nak pronounce da la I ni lidah melayu makan belacan xhingat donia.. sambil terkebil2 ibarat ikan belacak I pon sebut la perkataan tu semalu2 alam.. punya la marah cekgu tu terus dia cubet pewut I (hambek ko) I pon malu2 g balik tempat duduk sambil berikrar I xnak da belajar subjek English ni dengan cekgu garang yang hamat!

Pas2 tiap kali cekgu ni masuk I salu jer wat jatuh pensel la,,(jatuh bawah meja jer tapi nak amek kemain lame), g toilet lelame.. mcm2 la.. tapi sbb I ketua darjah selalunyer I kene deal la dengan para cekgu. Yelah, tolong angkat buku la, amek buku kedatangan dan bla bla bla..huhu. tapi.. walaupon I da tag subjek n cekgu tu..i belajar sendiri tapi melalui saluran yang agak kurang berkesan la.. lagu, buku cerita, movies. I xske pun b.i sebenarnye..tp terima kaseh pada cekgu 2..i belajar sungguh2 supaya I xperlu kene cubet lagi dengan cekgu tu.. –terima kaseh cekgu S-

Walaupon I ketua darjah..i xglamour pon cam ketua darjah lain.. sebab I ni cume itek hodoh jer –huhu- penting ke? Lol.. tp pas2 upsr dapat la I merasa B kat subjek ni.. its ok la..ß-riak dan takbur kan..bagus la 2..amalkan selalu ;p.. sal tulah b.i I mmg hancuss dan banyak ayat cam syok sendiri jer.. lagi plak I ni kengkadang wat2 konfiden jer..asal bunyik sedap dan cam betul jer..i hentam je la.. don’t afraid to be wrong.

And honestly.. i do learnt a lot from the day I’d been pinched by her. Do not give up no matter what –even a pinch! Hihi..

I see u;

                         

walls

 I do put some partitions in my life..esp in my heart.. –we cant trust people to always take a good care of it so yeah..it must have been some gaps- when I met strangers I do want to take times and efforts to know them. And I do not take any impression on them. Well..people say that first impression is important but not for me. It’s difficult to know someone just by a glimpse. I don’t imply it and I totally didn’t acknowledge love on the first sight.

So that’s why I put some walls between my very tiny heart –melodramatic me- maybe being the second child makes me fragile and vulnerable-well it’s the weakest point, but I don’t have to be one, though- if I don’t like someone, I rather not talking to them, better yet I’m avoiding myself to be surrounded by that negative auras – fascinating?- and obviously, I will never try to like them if they don’t want to like me. I will never put any efforts even as small as baby ant – huhu- if u didn’t like me.. neither me have any reason to be near you.

Mom was right..she is and always be right - ^_^ - we don’t have actually repay whatever people did to us –bad things of course- we don’t want to be as bi-a-tch (lol..mom didn’t say this words..but it comes from my alter ego ;p ) as they are. The most important thing is we have to take care of ourselves and live happily as we should. And as for me.. people who had entered my life definitely got their own places in me. some might marked something but sometimes it just temporary. Some just enough to be surrounded for formal/professional purpose –and Im sure I wanna leave it to be a fomal relationship only..which they cant never interact with my personal life nor know bout it- while some are permanently special and will never be erased –lol..so melodramatic ;p –

Owh btw, I went to KL for interview last Tuesday.. even using gps still managed to be lost..lol.. surely I wont drive alone there –kindly encik offered to be my driver..huhu- when we were lost I just keep silent as he alwiz asked me the direction –hello..thats why we have gps- before he managed to mad at me I just keep my mouth shout and let he drove calmly with that gps..haha.

Well.. june will end and july will come.. and then it will be fasting month then raya.. and after 3 months there will be a new year once again.. how fast time walks us by.. and me.. still didn’t achieve my target – which obviously my master- erkk…its now or never! 

and i thought i was going to forget u...

10 o’clock this morning i had an interview with company R. i do felt nervous..(like butterflies in stomach.. needed to go to toilet..etc <---- nervous symptoms i guess..huhu) but i told myself those butterflies, they have got to be murdered by any chance.. n earlier this morning, i kept repeating myself begged encik to not allow me to go for that interview..but he just ignored me as expected..lol..(i have a serious issue with someone there who eventually will become part of me??)

since the company also, like, wanted-so-badly-for-me-to-attend-it (as they calling from Saturday till 930 this morning) so I just let go the-feeling-of-unpleasant-to-certain-people.. well..when I arrived there.. I had to wait for a girl who came earlier. (luckily only one person ahead) since this is my second time here (interview) I didn’t feel much pressure compared to previous one …haha… while am waiting I grabbed magazines there. Well..its more to engineering…pfff what am I expecting from engineering company..lol (laugh at myself)

I didn’t pay much attention bout what I was reading until I finally came across an interesting article (for me of course) something bout bioengineering, nanotechnology and most importantly how they implement those two in treating some bacterial infection (which I forgot the name) and in process to proceed it to the higher level; drug.. they actually wanted it to be user friendly which can be found in daily usage/ toiletaries n stuff..

Oh my.. I talked to myself.. I left all this like almost a year.. I didn’t know how much I missed all the researches, the knowledge, the sciences, the biology itself..  I knew im so into designing drug.. I even had my 3 years constructing a hypothetical pathway.. (ok..i lied..the pathway took about a year to complete..another 1 year am mining information..another 1 year full of rejection..huhu)..

Well.. now what I can do is completed writing journal and submit my thesis..prepare for viva (hopefully!) and then graduated as master student.. its like a dream for me.. yet its in my list to-be-achieved before I can even think about tie-what-so-ever knot..

warkah berlagu pilu

Alhamdulillah… *senyum-senyum*

Permohonan untuk tambah masa sem ni diluluskan sudah…lepas hampir 4 bln berhempas pulas *fax sana sini..tipon orang itu ini* akhirnya mak sampaikan khabar gembira ni semalam *sal surat dr Uni kat melaka kan..sampai tak lena tidur malam* hihihi..

Seronok? Sangat la kan.. lepas ni nak konpem kan dengan Uni sal kes I ni.. pastu leh la anta notis penghantaran tesis..plus abstract plus journal *omg omg paper xsiap2 lg*  tp xpe..yang penting daftar sem dulu then baru anta notis and pape yang dikehendaki..

^_____________________^

~mungkinkah I leh konvo tahun depan? Smbil mata bersinar2…~ lalalalala

cemburu bertempat

Ari jumaat…yeay! Esok cuti ^_______________^ (hamboi..senyum lebo..)

Sumhow..this tiny little feeling keep popping in my heart…ddduuuhhh..

I know I am some kind of weirdo since I was a small child.. (lol..ok..just kidding)

There’s a voice whispering as m looking for people profiles or status in facebook..

A pretty girl who happened to break-up with her ex seems to have a new relationship –am not jealous

Some old schoolmates finally tying their knots –still am not jealous..but happy for them

Some friends had their wedding of the year and look so gorgeous –am not jealous at all

Then there are friends who living abroad and enjoying their life –well..they are lucky..but still..im not jealous

But when…

Some friends had their viva or submitted their thesis or.. they finally had their master convocation… -well hell yeah I am totally jealous!

I mean how could they possible finished their master whilst im on the other hand? Im so pissed off with myself for not being able to finish it according to my plan.. hello? I’m 27, I started my master at the tender age of 24 and it took me almost 3 years now!  It just a master degree..how could I possibly not finished it when technically all I did was just analyzed and built pathway!!!!!

Owh my.. this is not supposed to happen..not to me..not to anybody.. m hoping someday me and my friends could breaking free from all this hectic and pathetic situation..

today was a fairytale

“”Argon is a chemical element represented by the symbol Ar. Argon is the third most common gas in the Earth's atmosphere, at 0.93%, making it more common than carbon dioxide.

Arginine (abbreviated as Arg or R)^[1] is an α-amino acid. The L-form is one of the 20 most common natural amino acids.””

Huhu..its about a year since I left my student life..(a year n 4 moths to be precise) ok I still didn’t manage to graduate this year as a master student ( for crying out loud…!) minus other people mistakes, I blamed myself for being soooo slow in writing my thesis (sometimes I wish I’d taken coursework..then only I can graduate in a year!) -_-“ just a pathetic me as always..lalalalala

Back to argon and arginine.. this is a story about a girl who always confused, clumsy and not far from mistakes ( this is not a long-long time ago..far far away story to tell..hihi) as usual this girl (I named her Ms. B) will wear baju kurung to office (duhh..well she’s soo old fashioned in many ways..ehem) she will do her jobs as account exec (quite fascinating as she didn’t do well in her own account but now she’s in charge in whole set company’s account –ok..this is a bit naik bakul angkat sendiri..) 

And it’s time of the year where the company has to do some audits (-_-“) –she wished for some-handsome-like-anuar-zain auditor will come..but then it’s a big NO! lol… she just had to compile all those important files..etc…etc and then send it to auditors (owh well..just assume the auditor is someone who as scary as nightmare monsters..huhu – sedapkan ati jer) then a few gas invoices came before her very own eyes.. she read it a while as she wrote the details of her notebook…and came across symbol ARG.

Surprisingly, she told herself..eh? ade ke org gune gas arginine? Eh bukan arginine tu peptida ke? Camner leh jadi gas…and so on…wonder if she’s a biologist-to-be (she used to…long time ago..huhu) and she called her assistant, asked her what’s the used of that ARG to our company..(pemikiran kritis dan kreatif hokey!)

Then ..

“ gas argon? Owh.. tu untuk customer kak.. dulu kita supply la..la ni tak amik da” she smiled as she replied Ms. B..

lol? Argon? Isn’t it supposed to write AR?

Oh well.. it seems the-ex-biologist-to-be is mixed up now..lol..